Now, stating that “this media is better than that media” is a big and bold statement. And I never really disclosed my pick for the greatest game of all time, until now as now on the 1st April 2019 I will now share my take on what is the greatest game of all time. Made by IO Interactive and published by Square Enix in 2010 – Kane and Lynch 2, so here are 5 reasons why.
Better shooting than Apex Legends and Fortnite
Now, I can happily say out of the septic tank of Battle Royale games that the one I would play would be Apex legends (a review here), but as I said in the review that the guns felt like a wild haymaker. In Kane and Lynch, however, it’s like a tactical nuclear bomb people go flying as you blast them into oblivion. And even if you crack a perfect headshot the force is so great, they get a pixelated face. So even if you are one of these overprotective parents who think video games are bad then this is pretty child-friendly…ish.
Oh, and unlike Fortnite where people spend more time, perfecting their 5-star hotel because someone thinks they are playing the Sims rather than a shooter, Kane and Lynch 2 fucks this off and you know where you stand – Shoot people, What more do you want?
More charismatic characters than The Last Of Us
The Last of Us is very easily one of gaming’s landmark titles with excellent gameplay, almost legendary story, lovely graphics and fun multiplayer, it’s surely one of the best. It could have been the best for one simple aspect – Charismatic Characters. Joel and Ellie are about the most miserable bastards known to man, oh, your daughter died in the outbreak Joel? You’re, not the only fucker who lost loved ones, so what makes you fucking special? And Ellie? Crying because you took a machete to a mild-mannered psychotic killer who likes eating humans? What about the rest of the population in the game that you shot or stabbed? Even the Clickers that look like what would happen if someone was face-fucked to death by Ron Jeremy.
Kane and Lynch, however, you know where you stand, 2 characters that are 100% angry all of the time, went streaking through the streets of Shanghai. Got over grief in 5 mins, not 20 fucking years and counting. And got shit done in half the fucking time it took for someone to escort “not Ellen Page” from Boston to fucking Salt Lake City.
Now, small emission while I’ve haven’t played all of the seasons of Telltale’s The Walking Dead (as the 4th season is ). I have played the 1st season which is still the best one. And one question that speaks to the mind is, why are they are called “Walkers” – They are Zombies, just call them zombies. Characters who bicker amongst themselves in a zombie apocalypse that makes 650 Members of Parlement look fucking competent when dealing with Brexit, and the whole plot can be summarized by saying “nearly everyone dies”.
Where in Kane and Lynch, however, Kane and Lynch kill the wrong person and causes all of the criminal underworld and police and army to come after them. All because this person was the daughter of a corrupt government official, so all of the odds are against them and as they survive getting repeatedly getting shot at, tortured to near-death, and having to defeat 2 dogs to hijack a commercial airliner. If you ask me as the TV series of the Walking Dead is woefully inconsistent and dull, and the games follow suit – Kane and Lynch 2 is so intense it’s assaulting your senses.
Better looking than Red Dead Redemption 2 and Shadow of The Colossus
Now, I admit that RDR 2 and Shadow of The Colossus are very fine looking, with RDR 2 in particular, having so many details its almost easy to accept the over designing. And Shadow of The Colossus does while look big and immense looks devoid of life and in ruins, it’s like going through the high street in Hull. Going back to RDR 2 is almost the same thing nearly odd settlements here and there and fuck all in the middle.
At least in Kane and Lynch 2 your in the bustling city of Shanghai, all portrayed on a cheap VCR camera by an unknown 3rd party who seems to be utterly pissed and has poor spatial awareness and slinkies for legs, it’s like the Blair Witch Project was made by fucking amateurs compared to Kane and Lynch 2.
Overall better game than Final Fantasy 7, Zelda: Breath of the Wild, neu-God of War and pretty much everything else.
So in short, Kane and Lynch 2 is a landmark title in gaming. That richly deserves a sequel like Half-Life 2 but we will never get one as Valve want to be a games distributor rather than a games developer and their hot properties are open to being completely shat on (see Hunt Down The Freeman). And while it looked at the failures of the previous game Kane and Lynch: Dead Men, which was fucking dull and boring. While Kane and Lynch 2 left me physically scared and left with no closure at all, much like Half-Life 2 in that regards. This makes it for me an outstanding game and if this was a proper review it would be a 10 on all regards.
Oh, and if you do disagree with me then be warned that I do not suffer fools gladly.